Sunday, February 23, 2014

announcing Alfred.

We finally got around Alfie's baby announcement. We love both, but I think the top is the sweetest though :)

Saturday, February 15, 2014

addison's valentine treat.

Valentines Day was pretty low key for us this year. But a definite highlight was Addison's Valentine treat: slow cooker cinnamon almonds. These were so easy and so delicious, we probably have a new love day tradition on our hands. And because I love you so much, I will share with you the recipe. 
1 1/2 C. Sugar
1 C. Brown Sugar
3 1/2 Tbsp. Cinnamon
1/8 tsp. Salt
1 Egg White
2 tsp. vanilla
3 Cups Almonds
1/4 C. Water

1. Mix together in a large bowl sugars, cinnamon, and salt.  
2. In another bowl with a whisk, mix together the egg white and vanilla until it is frothy.  Add the almonds and coat thoroughly.  This will help the mixture stick to the almonds during the cooking process.
3. Prepare your slow cooker by spraying it with cooking spray.  Add the cinnamon almond mixture to the almonds and turn it to low.  Stir until the cinnamon sugar mixture is coated well on the almonds. Also, just know, your house will smell amazing.
4.  Cook for about 3-4 hours, stirring every 20 minutes.  In the very last hour, add 1/4 cup water and stir well.  This will ensure a crunchy coating and help the mixture to harden.  
5. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and spread the almonds onto the sheet to cool.  The almonds should be pretty sticky so be sure to seperate them the best that you can and let them cool!  

(You may want to double the recipe so you have enough for yourself...and can share them too ;)

Watching "Return To Me", whilst eating Alfredo pizza and chocolate covered strawberries is my idea of an ideal night.
Also, we just watched "Philomena", and it was fantastic. Moving, good message, surprisingly funny, charming, hopeful. Go see it.

alfie lyle is a month old!

A month ago today I did the hardest thing I've ever done. And I fell in a deep love I never knew existed. Alfred has totally changed our lives. I've only begun to process what having a child means and I am in awe. Every day that he remembers how to breathe and eat and digest and blink is just a total miracle. Babies are so much smarter than we think! So much more capable.

Well, I wish I could report that he was just an angel baby and so easy, but the truth is, he's giving me a run for my money! It's so hard to know what babies want, and while I feel like my instincts are right on, I'm pretty lost! Haha, don't get me wrong, he's not a terrible baby either! He just is very particular. But if he's sleeping or eating-he's happy. He also has what I call "happy minute". Right after he's done eating, I pause to look at him for a while-it's my favorite time. He is so blissfully happy! After about a minute he starts to cry as he needs to be burped, but for that minute he is so irresistible! 

I'm getting used to being a "stay-at-home-mom". That first day truly alone with Aflie had me scared out of my mind. Not scared I wouldn't know what to do (well, that too) but mostly scared that after all of this, I wasn't going to like being a mom. Sounds weird, I know. But what if there were more cons than pros? What if after 9 months of suffering, where the only thought of sanity was holding my new baby wasn't worth it? (I think postpartum depression also plays a role in these thoughts) What I have found so far this week is that, no, it's not bliss every second. It's frustrating when your baby cries for seemingly no reason. And it's hard to sacrifice your nights' rest. It's hard for me not to be out and about all the time because I don't want to disrupt his sleeping pattern. It's gross to change diapers. It's frustrating when spit up is all over your third shirt of the day. BUT for that fleeting second when you catch a sleeping smile, for the moments you catch yourself staring at his sleeping angel face, for my "happy minute", for the second that he clings to hold on to your finger, for the second he does that billy goat sigh of contentment, it's all worth it.

Loving this new human being doesn't mean loving him only when he's cute or easy to love. This new parental love has opened me up to love him when he's screaming away for some reason I don't know. To not immediately go to frustration, but to feel compassion and want to do anything to make him happy, even at my expense. It's amazing to feel yourself open up to be that human being for someone else. And I guess that's the payback. That through the hard, frustrating, gross stuff, you feel yourself be transformed to someone you didn't know you could become. It's only the beginning, but I think so many seasoned moms are so accustomed to feeling this way they've forgotten that it was a transformation. I wanted to document that it truly is. 

Friday, February 14, 2014

Alfie's first valentines day.

what a sweet boy. This is from Alfie's newborn photoshoot! The rest of the pictures aren't finished yet, but I'm so glad we got this one just in time for love day. I am so in love with this guy. He has melted our hearts. 

Addison headed to work, but not before a lovely Alfie snuggle in bed this morning. I can't believe I have two Valentines this year! Alfie was someone we were just beginning to discuss the possibility of last year.

Happy valentines day Addison! You are the love of my life.

Monday, February 10, 2014

mohawk monday.

happy mohawk monday from our crosseyed boy! it's been such a whirlwind month, but things are really slowing down and our new life with this sweet boy is starting to settle in. we have been so lucky to have pretty much a constant stream of loved ones here helping us adjust to new baby and soak up Alfie cuteness.

Addi and i got to sneak away on a much needed temple date while the in-laws babysat-as you can see, i actually put on makeup-total victory!
we visited daddy at work at Hollywood Studios...i'm crazy. i know.
 meeting Aunt Laila, Momma Melinda, and Papa Wayne for the first time!
 3 generations.
meeting uncle Landon...
 ...uncle Alex, Papa Rob.
 Addison and his new baby :) he is now the proud new owner of an ipad and in total heaven. he has a new calling to teach the 14 and 15 year olds sunday school, and this will be an amazing new tool! PLUS, we get to watch movies in bed now-score.

saying goodbye to my momma was so hard. she sacrificed so much to come and be with me for 3 whole weeks. she totally spoiled us with dinners and groceries-even mopped my floor! (my LEAST favorite chore) So wonderful to have a constant help :)

we will see you all in May, family!

Sunday, February 9, 2014

things i know about my little human.

my sweet Alfie man is 3 weeks old and currently battling his first cough :( ugh. i guess we are building his immune system. it is so hard not to feel like a bad mom when your baby is sick! you try to be so careful...but there's always something you could have done differently, i suppose. this little spirit in our home has completely consumed us. we stare at him all day and try to figure out who he is and giggle and sigh at his slightest...anything...burps, coughs, grunts, yawns, gas, you name it! it's noteworthy! here's what i've figured out so far:

-9 lbs and 14 oz-as of last Thursday.
-22 inches as of today.
-his neck is so strong-he loves to hold his head up and adjust.
-he no longer has back hair...sigh.
-his hairline is receeding....double sigh.
-his hearing is great-he jumps at everything!
-he's started to get light circles around his pupils.
-he often holds his pinkies up...he's really proper.
-when he sleeps, his cheeks drag down and make him look like he's frowning:
Alfie loves:
-to sleep in his bed...and if you hold him for too long he gets really mad.
-eating! and makes the cutest billy goat noises while he does so.
-baths and being warm.
-being swaddled, but likes his hands out and on his face, and many times holding his own binky in.
Alfie hates:
-getting out of the bath.
-being naked.
-being cold.
-lotion most of all.
-when momma eats lobster.

I love motherhood so far. even when i wake up at 3 in the morning to feed this guy, i am surprised at how often i am cooing at my baby's sweetness, or giggling at something cute he did. the most surprising aspect of the last few weeks for me is how my son truly knows me. you expect a newborn to just act like a puddle-but he knows things! he can tell it's me when i hold him. he can hear my voice and he reacts to it. it is amazing. it's like a little bonus gift for me-a little payback for those 9 months of suffering!

The bishop and his wife dropped by and the wife said something about babies that I've been thinking about, but she articulated perfectly. She said when she was handed her first baby in the hospital she was completely taken aback. she said she expected to get handed this fresh baby with a blank stare, but instead, he was wide awake and his eyes were so wise. it's as if babies know so much more than we could ever comprehend. they can't articulate it, but they have so much wisdom behind those eyes. She said the same was true with all her babies and once they learned to talk, it's as if it slowly disappeared. i experienced the same thing with this special spirit. he is so wise. sometimes he looks like he is seeing things so much more clear than i am. he has a different perspective than those that have been here a while. we've all forgotten, but he brings heaven closer to us with his spirit and those all-knowing eyes.